What I have learned in 365 days of searching for myself is this: We are not a $100 bill mixed in with the lint and receipts spontaneously found in an old coat pocket. “Finding yourself” is not a surprise that comes while doing laundry, during yoga or travel (which was my initial attempt to find myself). Our true self has been right there all along, buried under bad choices, cultural conditioning, people’s opinions, and conclusions we drew or were drawn for us as children.

These ideas become beliefs about who we are or who we were meant to be. “Finding yourself” is simply a returning to, a remembering of who you were before the world got its hands on you. Before our failures convinced us that that is exactly who we were. Before the noise of a broken hearts rattled in our chests from disappointment, and we covered it in a hard shell, thinking that would surely keep it safe and quiet the noise of the hurt.

In the process of losing anything significant, it is easy to lose sight of who we are. We often get so intertwined with the circumstances of our lives that their absence leaves us feeling empty, lost, and oftentimes confused. During this past year, I embarked on a journey to reclaim my identity, expecting to find it in new experiences or external validations. But what I found instead was a profound truth: our true selves are not something we find, but something we remember. It takes some determined, deliberate focus to rediscover such things lost.

There are seasons in life when we feel this sense of being displaced and without purpose. These times can be incredibly challenging, leaving us questioning our worth and direction. We might feel like we are wandering aimlessly, unsure of where to go next. It is during these seasons that we must dig deep and trust that beneath the surface, our true selves are waiting to be rediscovered.

In our quest to define ourselves, we often rely on external factors—relationships, careers, possessions, and social status. These things can provide a sense of identity and validation, but they are not permanent. When we lose these external markers, we may feel as if we’ve lost a part of ourselves. This raises a big question: How will we define ourselves when and if those things are lost or taken away? This question can alter our entire perspective on life.

The world makes it easy to forget that God alone created you to worship, to love, and to live out His signature blueprint. It takes quiet to clear the noise, strip labels, wade through consequences, sort out expectations, and peel the onion.

I started to spend more time in solitude, reflecting on my past, my choices, and the values that truly matter to me. This period of introspection helped me strip away the layers of societal expectations and past mistakes. I realized that beneath all the noise and chaos, there was a core essence of me that had remained unchanged—a part of me that was crafted by God’s own hands, meant to fulfill a unique purpose.

Once found, it’s like finding an old friend—someone you have been searching for what seems like forever. A familiar warm flickering light.

Kindle THAT flame.

Until it burns bright.

This is who God created you to be. You have a one-of-a-kind purpose in this world.

There is no one like you.

An original.

As I reconnected with this deeper part of myself, I found healing. The pain of loss was still there, but it was accompanied by a newfound strength and clarity. I began to see that my journey was not about finding a new self but rediscovering the person I was always meant to be, the person I had temporarily forgotten.

Take the time to reconnect with yourself and with God. It’s not an overnight transformation but a beautiful journey of returning home. Let go of the layers that have built up over the years and trust that beneath it all lies your true essence, waiting to shine. You are unique, you are loved, and you are exactly who you are meant to be.

It’s essential to recognize that true identity and self-worth come from within, not from the things or people around us. When we define ourselves by transient factors, we set ourselves up for a fall when those factors inevitably change. But when we root our identity in something deeper and unchanging, such as our intrinsic value and the purpose God has given us, we remain anchored no matter what life throws our way.

Be patient, kind, and forgiving to your TRUE self today. You are so worth it.